What Would Happen if Bruce Almighty Actually Pulled the Moon Closer?

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What Would Happen if Bruce Almighty Actually Pulled the Moon Closer?

When the Moon rushes up on you, you feel it.

By Cassidy Ward

What would you do if you could do absolutely anything? How would you care for your neighbors, reimagine your own life, and tell those around you that you love them? Would you lasso the Moon? In the 2003 supernatural comedy Bruce Almighty (streaming now on Peacock), Jim Carrey stars as Bruce Nolan, a regular Joe imbued with ultimate cosmic power after a one-on-one with the Almighty (Morgan Freeman).

Throughout the film’s 101-minute run time, Bruce learns that it isn’t so easy to run a universe, and that his relatively small problems might just be part of an ordinary life, and not a targeted campaign of terrorism from an omnipotent deity. But before that, Bruce uses his power to enrich his own life, getting himself a better gig at work and knocking the rust off his relationship with his girlfriend Grace (Jennifer Aniston).

Designing the perfect romantic evening involves freshly created flowers (a cross of tulips and daisies called tu-daisies) and some Barry White. Pretty basic courting behavior if we forget the genetic tomfoolery, but Bruce is just getting started. Next, he wipes away the clouds, revealing the full Moon in all its glory. Then he ties an invisible line around it, anchors himself to the balcony railing, and yanks it in. It makes for an incredible view, with some serious costs.

For More on the Moon:
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Remembering Apollo Astronaut William Anders and His Famous Earthrise Photo
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What If the Moon Moved Closer to Earth, Like in Bruce Almighty?

Bruce only knows precisely how much closer he pulled the Moon, but with our trusty tape measure and a TV screen, we can attempt to see the mind of God, temporary as that view may be. All we have to do is compare the apparent diameters of the Moon before and after Bruce moves it. The numbers you get will vary depending on how you’re watching the movie, but all that really matters is the ratio.

Using an iPhone and pausing the scene in question, the Moon begins a mere 0.6 centimeters and ends at exactly 2 centimeters. That’s an increase in diameter of 3.333 (repeating), and that tells us pretty much everything we need to know. The apparent size of an object has a direct relationship with distance – an object 2 miles away will have half the apparent size as the same object only a mile away – so if you know one value you can figure out the other.

In order for the Moon to appear 3.333 times wider in the sky, it would have to be 3.333 times closer. Normally, the Moon orbits at almost a quarter of a million miles away, but during Bruce’s romantic evening at home, it would have been only 72,000 miles away.

The next morning, Bruce and Grace wake to the news of freak tidal waves caused by “unusual lunar activity.” If the Moon actually moved that much closer, tidal waves would be a real concern, but that would only be the beginning. Gravitational influence depends on two things, the mass of an object and your distance to it. In our fictional scenario, the Moon’s mass isn’t changing, but its distance is.

Calculating gravitational influence is a little bit more complicated than distance, but we can take a stab at it. Ignoring all of the complexities involved in latitude and whether you're on the side of the planet facing the Moon or not, we can safely say that the Moon would exhibit a lot more gravitational influence on the Earth than it does today. The apparent strength of gravity decreases or increases with the square of the distance. That means that a Moon 3.333 times closer would exhibit more than 11 times as much gravitational influence on the Earth.

At that distance, the Moon would orbit the Earth once every 118 hours (just under five days), as opposed to the roughly 28-day orbital period it has today. The days would also get shorter. Today, the gravitational tether between the Earth and the Moon is slowly unraveling. Every year, the Moon gets about 4 centimeters farther away and it boosts itself into that higher orbit by stealing a little bit of rotational energy from the Earth. Consequently, the Earth’s rotation slows down a little bit. It’s a small effect, only a couple of milliseconds per century, but it stacks up.

If the Moon were much closer, the tidal relationships would change and the Moon, much closer and moving more quickly, would drag the Earth along with it, speeding up the rotation and shortening the days. You’d also see eclipses a lot more often, but they wouldn’t be as beautiful. Instead of the incredible coronal views that we’re treated to in the real world, the residents of a Bruce-ruled Earth would see the Sun entirely blotted out. Eclipses would be more frequent and last longer, but they’d be less fun. And we’d be so busy rebuilding infrastructure from all of the tidal destruction that we wouldn’t be able to enjoy them.

Catch Bruce Almighty, streaming now on Peacock.